Goodnight, my angel
by Trix a.k.a F5C
Summary: Ruhana ficcy... it's a songficcy... err... read plz and review as well


Title: Goodnight, my angel 1/1  
  
Author: F5C  
  
Genre: Yaoi  
  
Pairing: Ruhana Archive: FF.net eventually  
  
E-mail: chatterbox_shil@yahoo.com. Artist/Band: Billy Joel  
  
Title: Lullabye (goodnight, my angel)  
  
Kinda answer to Lita's petition., well I used the song. but it doesn't have a mother in it. does it still qualify?? Newayz. read on k?  
  
~*~  
  
Rukawa entered the sterile white environment and walked the memorised path to the room within which lay his heart. His one and only love. His one and only suffering and dying love.  
  
No one knew why his love was still alive, even the doctors found it hard to explain. The cancer had spread throughout the whole body, and it was evident that the other was in pain but yet he wouldn't let go. He just wouldn't die.  
  
Rukawa sighed out loud and prepped himself for the sight that no matter how many times he saw was still alien to his eyes.  
  
He turned the knob softly, not wanting to wake his love. He stood at the entrance and took in the sight of the body he knew so well, the body he loved so many times, the body that was once his security blanket, the same body that now lay limp in the white bed surrounded with annoying beeping machines with tubes going in and out practically every part of his body. He stood silent and still and watched the now mutilated body carefully, watching the broad chest rise and fall rhythmically.  
  
Rukawa felt his heart shatter into a million pieces and splinter every nerve. Each rising of his lover's chest was a renewed stabbing to his own heart. Searing white hot pain flooded his whole body and blinded his eyesight. He just couldn't get used to it. His once vibrant lover would never have wanted to end up like this, a vegetable but not really one, stuck in the middle, refusing to go yet dying to leave. Why won't he just let go.  
  
He sat next to the man who he has loved to the fullest for the past five years of his life. Life. will always be an unsolved puzzle, an illogical unsolvable challenge that no one will ever be able to figure. It's so willing to take the lives of those who love it yet it gives limitless chances to those who never really embrace it. I should be on that bed, not him. I gently brush the soft red locks away from his forehead and plant a soft kiss there; one that was supposed to be filled with reassurance but instead was filled with regret and anguish.  
  
"Kae.de??" "Sshh. Hana-kun, I'm here with you, ssshh" He winced at the hoarse whisper that he had heard, so unlike the deep exuberant baritone that use to reverberate off every object within a one mile radius of the lively red-head. This wasn't how it was suppose to be. they were supposed to grow old together and die bickering with each other over pitiful reasons. This wasn't it. This was a curveball that life had flung at them out of nowhere.  
  
"Sshhh. Hana baby. I'll always be here with you" He knew what he had to do. He had had the inkling that he knew why the other wouldn't go, but never did he give it any heed. Never till last night.  
  
In a millisecond all had become so clear to him, all his doubts erased, all his questions answered. everything as clear as the midnight blue sky that he had been staring at searchingly. All it took was a millisecond and he knew precisely what he had to do.  
  
He gently took hold of his love's hand and squeezing it softly he stared at the tranquil face that was imprinted in his mind for eternity and with that he allowed all his barriers to crumble.  
  
~*~ Goodnight, my angel, time to close your eyes  
  
And save these questions for another day  
  
I think I know what you've been asking me  
  
I think you know what I've been trying to say  
  
~*~  
  
A deep bass voice flowed from his mouth, the words coated with undying love and the torment of a lover who finally knew what was to be done.  
  
~*~  
  
I promised I would never leave you  
  
And you should always know  
  
Wherever you may go  
  
No matter where you are  
  
I never will be far away  
  
~*~  
  
Eyelids slowly lifted and tired brown eyes peeked thru at the man who was singing.  
  
Rukawa allowed a smile to grace his face all the time maintaining eye contact with the other.  
  
~*~  
  
Goodnight, my angel, now it's time to sleep  
  
And still so many things I want to say  
  
Remember all the songs you sang for me  
  
When we went sailing on an emerald bay  
  
~*~  
  
Love flooded the gaze that the two held with each other. Love emanated from his very voice. Loved glowed from the strained smile that the other was trying to form.  
  
~*~  
  
And like a boat out on the ocean  
  
I'm rocking you to sleep  
  
The water's dark and deep  
  
Inside this ancient heart  
  
You'll always be a part of me  
  
~*~  
  
The torment and anguish was not hidden no more. It floated about in the air surrounding the two, but the love that was present overwhelmed its existence.  
  
~*~  
  
Goodnight, my angel, now it's time to dream  
  
And dream how wonderful your life will be  
  
Someday your child may cry  
  
And if you sing this lullaby  
  
Then in your heart  
  
There will always be a part of me  
  
~*~  
  
His vision blurred as the grip of the other on his hand slackened. Silent tears flowed in tiny rivulets down his pale face, but the smile still graced his face.  
  
The shrill continuous beep of the heart machine didn't affect the two of them, to them it didn't exist. This was their final farewell and they weren't going to waste a second on such minor matters.  
  
In front of him stood his love, Hanamichi, in his full glory. Body as it once was, eyes as lively as ever. "Aishetru Kaede"  
  
~*~  
  
Someday we'll all be gone  
  
But lullabies go on and on  
  
They never die  
  
~*~  
  
He was gone or. maybe not.  
  
Rukawa felt a warm tingly feeling embrace his own heart and he finally knew the truth of it all. He got up silently and placed his last kiss on lips that he savoured to the maximum and walked out of the room, ignoring the doctors who had just barged in.  
  
~*~ That's how you and I will be ~*~  
  
~OWARI~  
  
Hehehehehehehe.. Sappy right?? Actually I have no idea what this falls under. I KILLED HANAMICHI!! I DID IT!!! I'm so happy!! I felt like killing someone and there!! I did it!! I KILLED HIM!! *dances around*  
  
Hehehe So.. what y'all think?? Any good?? 


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